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“ Bachelorette Service ”
Thursday, October 9 |5:05 PM

The secondary fours express and fives had our last chapel service, the Bachelorette Service.

Sighs.

It was only yesterday that I began to realise that I'm going to leave the walls of Pl very soon (yes, not more than 31 more days. I don't know if it's gd or bad. Because it marks both the end and the start of something) But I do know that I do not wish to leave Pl.

It's quite sad because I wasn't even able to take sit beside bestie during the last service. There was a place beside her but I couldn't move or else something bad will happen. I'm sorry bestie. ); But you had Edna & Amanda. (: The thought of the last chapel actually taunted me throughout the whole Sing & Praise session. I was dull and moody, even on the verge of crying when they sang some particular song (idk the title) Sighs. The thought of not being able to experience just this one last chapel with bestie added on to the sadness.

(Arghhhhh, splitting us up during normal days is tolerabel! But but but it's the last chapel!)

Okay, and so the pastor preached & all. I was super emotional and I kept telling myself.. "I do not want to graduate... I don't wanna leave this place" Awww, sounded like mfbbt, lol. To add on to all these unhappiness, the girl beside me doesn't understand the significance of this whole service & doesn't understand my feelings. She even sacarstically said "Why so sad? Oh, *mimicks* cause it's the last service... aww..." I looked at her and gave the '...' face. What the hell? It may not mean a lot to you, but it means a lot to me.


Hello, my goodness me. It is not a game or an outing. -.- Please have some respect. Don't go just for the sake of going lah! Wpiang. Pissed off leh. A person who thinks the bible is boring actually went up. Irony.

Okay, then the teachers showed us their slides. Gosh, I cried.

Yeah, I cried. That girl beside me was so hard and cold, so I tried to hold back my remaining tears.

Oh well.

That was basically the Bachelorette Service.

I regretted for not being able to experience this with someone who treasures this memory. ); Sighs.

I shouldn't have let her gone her ways.

Anyway, I'm really sad that it's the last service. Probably my last chapel service? I wouldn't know unless I go into a misson school the next time.

k that's all.

Labels:


“ confessions ”
Monday, October 6 |9:50 PM

PS: I am going to be quite opened about the issue in this post. This is not about me ranting about V(told you can't be bothered with her anymore) but more about my how it has affected me and the people around me.

I'm sorry , I didn't know my ignorance towards will cause you so much trouble. ):

I didn't mean to put you in the spot. But I really emphatise your situation because you've did nothing wrong, yet you've been wronged by for stealing away her friend(s). Sighs. I do not wish to talk to her because I am unhappy with the way she treats you & many other issues, ie: being too selfish/domineering/jealous/unreasonable. I feel sorry for you because you've been blamed for the slightest things ie: talking to us.

THAT IS WHY I'VE BEEN IGNORING/AVOIDING HER THESE DAYS.

However it is apparent that doesn't want to admit about these facts. She chose to blame it on someone else. And you are one of them.

I'm so sorry that I've brought this upon you. I'm so sorry that I've dragged you in this. And I know you get frustrated at times too. I am not just close to you during this period of time because I was pissed with . I did not take you as a spare tire, I hope you know that. (: It's just that whenever I'm in good terms with her, I will think of her feelings, that is why I tend to give in more to her and not you(because she is a tough character) as she will definitely be angry I do some things with you and not her. During this period of time, I haven't been paying attention to her and thus I can just take and do things openly with you. In the past, I had to be conscious of her feelings... but now I've decided to keep a distance from her, so yes, it appears that I am closer to you and that I can openly make more friends.

I know you felt guilty because you thought that I wasn't talking to her because I was talking to you. I just want to let you know that it isn't your fault. The whole not-talking-to-vivien thing has nothing to do with you. (: Even if it has, it's just like 10%, before you there has been a lot of things happening already.

I heard you saying that you were scared to be close to me and qing because you didn't want to hate you. Sighs, I really do not know how to handle the situation now. I do not want you to be hated by Tell me what's wrong with making friends? ;/ I don't understand what's the fuss about.

I really do not wish to lose you as a friend because of her, please do not avoid me. ): I felt it today already, it's terrible.

Everytime when we're in a group, she isn't able to tell me anything because I have this barrier... Why? Because they are all scared that will hate them for talking to me. Yes, unfortunately that is true. But is the best, because she and already has some conflict, that's why she isn't scared to be hated by lol.

I find that it's hard for me to even talk to anyone in the group because I do not want them to get involved in this whole thing. But it hard just not to talk to anyone.

If this continues, I may not be even to have any friend, everyone is going to avoid me because of Vivien. Arghhhhhh.

Totally lost now. The situation is getting worst. I hear the comments by different people everyday, telling me about the complaints she made. I get pissed and unhappy because she is telling different people in the clique different things. Telling different people that she hates different people. I wonder if our friendship is true, since there's so much backstabbing here and there now. It's so hard to trust you now.

If you label others as the 'third' (fourth actually) party, then what about you? You are just about the same as them. You cut into. But did we say anything about you? You can, others cannot? lol. We invited you in and happily let you join our world, can't you just give others a chance?

You understand what it feels to be lonely and ignored and blamed, spare a thought for others? ;/

I'm so sorry for anyone whom I've brought trouble to. ): I really didn't mean it.

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“ nineteen days. ”
Saturday, September 27 |8:08 PM

& I don't really like to talk to A class people because their vocabs are way to luxurious for my ear to hear. They make me feel stupid. They discriminate people, except the minorities. (:

Hahaha, that was a freaking random thought.

I hate my layout now. The words are so small but I can't make it any bigger unless I increase the size of the text, which I do not wish to do so.

Anw, I met up with my long lost biological father last week. I shall call him the white porcupine as he has a potruding mole of about 1cm x 1cm, with a few short spikey white hairs on it. Ewwww! & He looks more china-ish now. Must be the person he hangs out with.

I told him just to leave me alone. I failed in doing so, instead the lawyer has drilled a notebook out of him, which I'm going to get it this week! I'm ecstatic! (:

He asked me to text him the specs. I did, and told him the exact model I wanted plus another more expensive model in comparison so that he'll choose the one that I like & buy it for me. Mind you, he is stingy.

Unfortunately, he doesn't agree to give me a Sony Vaio. He said I be more practical and realistic and ended the whole message with "Daddy loves you" -,- Even suggested another brand, shan't say which because I do not want to offend anybody.

Tsk, can't bear to part with your money then come straight to the point. Don't have to make excuses to justify yourself. My mom could have just easily bought one for me if I asked, but I didn't want to because I feel the pitch if my mom uses her money to buy it for me. I feel better if I get it from him because he is just a nobody to me.

Srsly, I couldn't bring out anything to reminise about him. He said that he was good to me and my mother was the one who disciplined and hit me in the past. Yes, that is the truth, but I am happy to be disciplined by her. And I feel the pain when I see what he did to my mom.

I wasn't very involved in the whole issue but I empatheize with my mom.

I am fine without him because it doesn't make a difference anyway. But it is sickening when he is so freaking stingy. (I am not saying this just because of the notebook) The problem would be solved earlier if he would to pay the maintanence, although we don't need it. But heck, he's supposed to.

Arghhh, pissed lor.

Got money don't wanna spend on us, spend on other people who will end up running away with YOUR money. LOL. I feel so ashamed of having a father like that. Rich so what? Go university so what? Still stupid.

-.-

But anyway, I found a cheaper Vaio, I hope and pray that he'll agree to give me that. I've dropped my expectations by half already okay! I think he should give in too. It takes two hands to clap.

(:

Okay, even if he doesn't give me that I will still be happy. What for harp over a notebook. Am just pissed cause he is so stingy!

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“ identity crisis ”
Tuesday, September 9 |7:42 PM

I haven't been too good these days. I've been struggling to find my purpose in life. Have you found your purpose?

I don't know why but this issue has been affecting my mood. I don't think any one of my age will be in the right mind to be thinking of her/his purpose in life when they're supposed to be mugging like hell for prelims/o levels.

I haven't found my real purpose in life and that is really bothering me.

I broke down and cried countless times because of this.

Arghhhhhhh.

I've found temporary purposes/escapes in the past. Idolising celebs. I know that is bad because they are temporary escapes and when I stop idolising, I find that I can't find my purpose in life. Ironically, I do not know how does my existence affect the celebs or what is my purpose for idolising, but it has served as a temporary escape. Maybe because I was too involved in knowing their information/news that I totally forgot about my purpose. ;x Maybe that took my off for a while? I don't know.

Few years back (woah I sound old), I found myself in a similar situation. I didn't know what I was living for. I'm meaningless. Who would care if I died? Would anyone cry or shed a tear for me? Would my mother even cry? Would she be sad? Or maybe happy because she doesn't need to pay for my expenses anymore? A load off her burden? I'll just live everyday without anyone knowing my existence, without anyone caring for me... I was that pessimisstic. Ah well, then I found a temporary escape... lol, wangzi/bbt.

Yeah, I was too caught up with him so I didn't care about my purpose (again), that caught myself occupied for the past 9months+++. I tried to avoid talking about him because I want to concentrate on my studies. & since I see him lesser now,(arghhh, stupid andy ge) the craze isn't that huge now. Oh, but I still do like him. (:

As much as studying gets into my life, I lose interest in many things I used to like. There was a time when studying/revising has blended into my normal routine, but after this one week break, I realise I've kinda stopped studying. The more I study, the more I lose the real me.

I'm so confused. I don't get the purpose of life. All I do is study study study, study so hard to earn money, earn money to spend on nice clothes and get a good life, and then die when I'm old and sick.

The fear creeps into me. I cry when I start studying but yet I do not find interest in watching the tv or using the computer. (I am crying as I'm typing this)

Arggghhhhh. I don't know where I'm getting to. I fear failing.
I fear life.
I fear everything.
I don't even know what I'm trying to say now.
I can't find a purpose in life & learning.

Yes, that is it.

I can't find a purpose in life & learning.

It is just to let me live a better life. I am not motivated to... oh wait I can email candice. (off to email candice,) Oh hello I'm back.

Seriously, I feel very empty in my heart. Grrrrr. I've cried almost the whole of sunday. I didn't cry yesterday because I was too occupied. And I cried today while typing.

Plus everyone out there is mugging so hard. No one will care about you. The only one who cares will be the one who will bring you trouble, hahah yes for my case.

I'm very vulnerable now.

I really do not know why but I'm not motivated to do anything. I just want to sleep and die in my sleep. I am serious.

Ahhhh I remember Mrs Tay said she felt the same way after graduating from uni too. So she accepted Christ and had faith. Oh welll, that was last year.

Oh I think I didn't mention that I was attend church now. (; But I still haven't found my purpose in life and pastor how preeched about it last week. I don't know if it was the sermon or what, but after that day I felt super demoralised about this issue. I can just sit and stare at blank spaces thinking about my purpose and start to cry...

How?


I am depressed really.

I'm feeling emptiness.

I think if no one can help me I need to write to Aunt Kelly. -.- Ha, she'll be like.. "No, everyone has a purpose in life, don't think that way." -.- Stupid cliche answers.

I miss my mother. I want her to at home now.

I WILL STUDY, BYE.

Argghhhhh, I miss my mother.

Labels:


“”
Sunday, September 7 |5:41 PM

I cried countless times today...

Labels:


“ Mixed emotions ”
Saturday, August 30 |1:16 PM

Part one of prelims has just been marked to an end.

(;

Prelims prelims has brought some friendship problems. ); I've not changed, I know that. I am still the same me. Just that I tell you off more directly now, because I do not want to keep things in my heart. It'll be worst.

I do not know what is wrong, but you've been getting jealous & angry over small things. Yes, small minor things. I do not understand why you're so petty. I know you're feeling the insecurity in your heart, but don't you know that friends can't be sooo sticky? ;X I know how you're feeling because I'm exactly like you last time. Being like that doesn't help you at all. It'll just bring yourself unwanted trouble.

I do not know how to help you now. I look at you and now I feel like... we're strangers. Your attitude is turning worst. I am just totally speechless when I'm with you.


Take that aside.

I'm actually happy because I've met Mrs Tng (My Primary school form teacher yesterday!) and caught up with my other primary school mates even though I felt like bashing some people up (Talk that later). ;D I missed Mrs Tng so much! She's like my second mother! hahahha.

Camwhored basically the whole day... From school to esther's house. :D

Okay I've got tonns of pics to upload but I've got to prepare for tuition. So I'll update later. (:

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“ Mediator ”
Sunday, August 17 |11:58 PM

I dislike being the mediator okay! tsktsk, I feel like pinching those people who's making me feel like a middleman now. Pinch out all your fats ahhhh! Okay, no cannot, must let you all be fat, hahaha.

Worst than Iraq and Iran war, lol! Being the middleman sucks like hell.

I'm afraid I'd be too close to one and neglect the other.

);


Have y'll been the middleman? Do you know how much it hurts and how hard it is to please everyone? When you please one, you have to 'neglect' the other. I'd better be in my own world and heck care about the two of you.

This problem has been there since P6, childish or not? They two quarrel since P6 leh! Same clique but hate each other. -,- I wouldn't have to lie, not because of the two of you.

SIGHS, WLAO. PUT ME IN THE SPOT ONLY! One is my partner somemore, tsktsktsk.




Oh this pic is quite small? LOL!
We lost to China. But it's okay, we've got a silver. First medal in 48years, I'm so happy and proud for Singapore! (: YAY.



4more days to prelims,

My eye's dry and red. How? I'm having fever and I've got sore throat. Orals tomorrow! How? );
I've been sleeping late because I get awake at night, I'm noctural, HOW?

HAIYAH. BODY PAIN, SHOULDER PAIN, EYE PAIN, WHOLE BODY PAIN. WALK LIKE AHMA. HOW?

OLD ALREADY.

Hahahhaha. Ah and BBT'S graduating! That is totally bad. OH WO DE WANGZI ~

AND DARLIE'S XIAOYU ~ OOOHLAAAAAA.


That's all for now, kthxbye

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“ once again. ”
Friday, July 18 |11:26 PM

There she goes AGAIN.

Second time this term, second time out of 16days. Stupid childish actions. I do not understand what is wrong with her. She gets angry because we asked her out for Ice Cream tomorrow, but unfortunately she can't make it cause she is grounded.

Fyi, we do not know that she's grounded (except me). But she doesn't act as if she is grounded because she still comes to my house. *rolls eyes* Put that aside.

Last week,

We went to gift shop to purchase some food, we did tell her that we were going. Apparently, she didn't hear it. So she assumed that we left her there alone. And me, knowing that she hates to be alone, still left her alone there. I admit I was in the wrong, but I thought she was okay with it already. Because two days ago, I left her alone while I purchased something but she had no feelings about it.

The gift shop was filled with people, so we left her for about 5mins. (?) When we came back and talked to her, she was obviously unhappy. Then she walked off alone, WHICH IS TOTALLY CRAZY AND NOT HER. Yup, we knew that she was angry.

Only I knew that she was angry because we left her alone. The rest was oblivious I suppose. They were shocked that she was angry over such a small matter.

She was angry and stuck to S for chapel. Apparently, S wanted her to patch up with us, so she told her "Hey, A is sitting here. Don't sit here la" So she had nowhere to go but to sit beside Q. I wasn't there because was at another row. What I'm going to say later is based on what S,Q and M's convo.

So when she sat down, Q asked her why she was sitting there. (She was supposed to be angry) She thought that she's the Queen la, she said "You think I want to sit here. I also don't want. S chased me away la!" Of so many empty seats, she have to sit with Q? Obviously she doesn't have other choices/friends to chose from. M replied her "You don't want to sit here can go away la!" Then they quarreled, I do not want to elaborate.

Few days later, we patched up.

This wednesday,

We were deciding to go citylink for the new choc shop. We've decided the time and date, this saturday because it's the school's muscial. So when Q told her "Hey, we going to eat choc this sat, you want?" She flared up and walked away.

WT@#$%^&*(@#$%^&*(#$%^&*(?!?!??!


Tell me what is wrong with that girl.

But she still decided to talk to M and W, I guess cause they aren't going. I have no idea why but she was angry with me too. S told me she was angry because she's grounded, she can't go out and got no money.

Okay?!???!

I know she might be unhappy cause we're going without her, but that doesn't give her the right to #$%^&*()ing even be angry with Q. Q didn't even know she was grounded.

On that day she was okay with M and W, so we kinda patched up. But she flared up again cause I went studying with W. I did not tell her. Okay, she isn't my mother. I do not need to report to her. I did not want to tell her because I know she's tell me "I AM GROUNDED. HOW YOU WANT ME TO GO?" Tell her also wrong, don't tell her also wrong. Shitzxzxzxz.

Then on Thursdays, we were fine.

But Q told me that she said that she disliked me. Wah, she is the bomb. Before that she told me she dislike P. For what? For P assuming her of dirtying the table, but she didn't. *rolls eyes* Plus, P is her good friend. Just two weeks ago she said she liked me more than Q, and now she said that she dislike me.

Okay, acceptable. She can dislike me all she want. I am not going to give a damn.

YA, SHE DISLIKES ME BUT MESSAGES ME NONSENSE. Like 1)Yubai today show what? Please, I don't watch it, how I know? 2) I'm eating apple for dinner
And so?

She's so shit.

Today she got angry again for idk what reason. She overheard S and my convo, she thought too much and thought that I knew she said that she dislike me. = = I don't know where she got the idea I was angry, but...

She texted me,


She is A and am Q.

A: Eh. You angry with me ah?

Q: Yes, few days ago.

The truth is, I am still angry.

A: Cos you think that I keep getting angry over small things Right.

Q: Yes.

A: Tell you what. I ALSO DON'T KNOW WHY. I think i pms-ing. But come to think of it. Where got pms so long one. Somemore my mesnse still haven't come yet eh

Excuses. You can pms the rest of the 2008 & all your life, by then say bye to me. You can pms I cannot is it!?

Q: Yes, I knoew you were pmsinglast wk. This wk too. But you can't be pmsing forever..

A: Ya la. But I thought about smth during english. (What?) You say you cannot group tuition and you are like going with two ppl? And Q just ps me like that next friday?

Q: I am just trying out. I wasn't the one who initiated the tuition thing. W asked me so I just go and try. ya i know i'm wrong and u're angry with me too

My fault W don't want to ask you to join the tuition meah? The fact is that you are jealous.

A: But you all one by one ps me

Q: For Q case, you still have meiee. And what did i ps you for tuition?

WTH?!? PS HER IN WHAT WAY LA. I was never in the same tuition as her neither I left her alone or what when I went tuition. = =

A: Ya. That time got midyears then i also asked ou what. Okay. Forget it. Put that aside. What time you want need tmrw (I think she had typo error)

Q: actually cause we talk alot then i can't concentrate tuition la.

A: Aiya. Answer my question

Q: i don't know.

Don't feel like replying her already. Meet what time also not her problem, SHE IS GROUNDED.

A: Attire?

Q: Haven't decided.

A: Hey. I maybe need to borrow necklace from you.

Q: Which one? I confirm wearing necklace too.

WTH??? still dare to ask me for necklace.

A: Great -.- lol. decided what time to meet?

Q: huh? meet? you mean meet earlier? :/

A: Eh. I ask you ah. Cityhall got place sell cake. I want buy for my dad

Q: I thought you grounded?

A: What. I told him say go eat lunch and dinner

Q: oh, you coming with us is it?

A: If not why I ask you meet what time

Q: I thought you grounded what. How i know you can come? Somemore that time you say until like you cannot come.

Plus angry with us like the whole world offended you.

A: Pekcek what. lol

Q: Pecek? Don't understand what talking you. No link.

Pekcek is your problem. We are friends, you can tell us what you're pekcek about and not take us as your bin to vent you anger! Wlao. Pekcek gives you the right to be angry is it?

A: That time pekcek so say until cannot go la.

Q: ...

So being grounded is fake?

A: So tmrw meet what time. Decided what to wear ready not?

Q: they meeting at cityhall at 2. i meeting S, we go somewhere else first.

A: Where

Q: Dont' know.

A: Then me ley

Q: you want you meet at my house at 1230

You go and die la! Never invite you come then you want to come. Invite you come then scold us, angry us!

I so nice, know that she don't know how to take mrt. 16 years old already, don't know!? wlao. That's why ask you come with us. If not some shit will happen again.

A: Okay. Are you like putting make up?

Q: No. I going to sleep already. Gdnight.

Q: Btw, so if you get scolded by your dad it's not our fault. Yup, okay, gdnight bye.

A: Whats your problem la. I say I tell him le what.

Q: I am just worried that you may be pecek or sth? *shrungs*

A: ...





YOU LIAR. I THINK BEING GROUNDED IS FAKE.

You caused so much trouble, I am so tired and bored of trying to please you already. Once or twice pms is suitable. You've been pmsing too much.

Don't blame pms for everything my dear girl. Awwwww.

So find something else better to do.

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“ insecurity ”
Monday, June 9 |3:39 PM

This feeling of insecurity increases day by day. I need some confirmation from someone. ); I'm feeling very lost now. I need some direction. );

Okay, no one knows what I'm talking about. I do.

梦想出发 闪耀小巨蛋演唱会 Meng Xiang Chu Fa Shan Yao Xiao Ju Dan Yan Chang Hui DVD

yay, the dvd audio version. (;

I'm not happy neither am I happy. I don't even know how I should feel right now.

kthxbye.

Labels:


“ hyped up ”
Sunday, May 25 |12:37 AM

Chinese O's is just tomorrow.

This is, my exam hall.

Well, I got back my results for midyears. Totally screwed up (i mean it really screwed, like failing 6 subjects) Surprisingly, I'm not boasting, I got 9th in class. It's not even something to be proud of. My results can't even get me to a college, I can't even get into a poly. That's how bad the whole cohort did.

Even the A class had minimal A's. As little as 2 people got A's for combined Humans. I can't remember the rest though.

I was shocked when I got back the results. No one except Q knew my rank at first. People discussed their ranks and all but I kept quiet, I didn't really want to be seen as "boasting", you know? So I just quietly sat around and commented that I did badly. By the time people shared their ranks, they got alittle too excited over it, so I didn't quite have the chance to say. Haha.

A asked my rank while she was discussing with Q. V said she was second last in class, S said that she was the 3rd last in class. Before I could even say anything, S commented/boasted or whatever shit "She ah, confirm get 20plus one la!".

Excuse me, who are you to even comment that I get 20plus. I don't know why but you do piss me off when you say things like that. I do not get pissed if V or Q say the same thing. Who are you to say this and how dare you. What's your rank? Excuse me, I am so damn pissed. You don't even know me, so don't try to act as if you do. The Shiqi you know is just the superficial me, you don't even know who I really am deep inside. Tsk!

Just because Q did badly this time, doesn't mean I did badly. Okay, I did badly, but compared to the rest, I didn't. Shut your mouth. Tsk! And yes, then after A knowing that I supposedly got 20plus, she didn't probe further, so well, only Qing knew my rank.

Yesss, I can't stand it when you have to use my correction tape. I know I'm being very petty over here. But who uses my tape and all does affect my mood. Same thing here, if it's anyone else, I would be most willing to lend them use all the tape. But you, no!

You came all the way from the back, called me by my full name
and demanded me for the tape. I was already not quite happy when you said "Okay, then I shall accompany you." because I wanted to go Popular to buy my stationeries. I don't need your accompany, it's more like you need my accompany so that you can eat your bloody KFC. You make it sound like I am desperate for your company, sorry to disappoint you, I am not.

You demanded for the tape, I asked why. You said you need it for your Ten Year Series. My goodness, it's just a bloody TYS. I am sure that if you use it, you'll use alot. I showed signs of rejection. "You got your own why don't want to use?!"
"Mine finished"
"Then don't use."
"But you don't need it."
"Why you need it?"
"For my ten year series lah!"
*reaches for my tape*
"Don't use la, wah lao eh. Ten year series also must use ah!"
"Must be neat"

Wth, neat. Since when were you even neat? Tys just cancel la, like you need it in the future! USE RULER TO CANCEL ALSO NEAT OKAY. I'm sorry, I am not usually like that. It's because I've been too good to her usually, that she takes advantage of me. So, I'm not quite happy with her now. Little actions of her spite me up.

& My god. I didn't even want to eat lunch with her. Just because I was going to Heartland doesn't mean I have to lunch with her. Tsk! She's the champion. She knows that if she asks other people along I will confirm go. Great, she asked Mei along. So, I went. And wtf, just because she wanted to eat KFC we all have to follow her and eat KFC. Who are you man. And you know it very well that I do not eat outside (with you in particular), why did you even ask me to accompany you?

I was hungry but I didn't eat because I didn't want to eat with you and that I want you to know that I HATE KFC (even though I don't), just because you're eating it, I choose to hate it. You said you wanted to go on a diet, how do you do that la. You eat so much snacks, drink so much sweetened drinks, eat so oily fast food. You won't get skinny please. YOU WOULDN'T. I will suan you if you still stay the same after your so called intensive exercise. I want to see how you do it, I want to see how you slim down. And if you starve yourself to slim down, I'll laugh. You're so pathetic, you can't control your diet that you have to starve. Go ahead. Starving to slim down is stupid.

Your actions just pisses me off. I tried to be nice to you but you took advantage of me again and again. I should just be nasty for awhile.

Sorry, this is abit emotional and personal. I can't stand it already.


Most memorable thing of the week was:

Gossiped with viv on the phone till 4am, woke up at 6:15AM and breakfasted with viv. We talked so so so much about guys, I couldn't believe that side of her, it was just so not her. Haha. Talked friendships and boyfriends. (; Yay, it's fun talking to her. But you never know how she'll suan you or accidentally expose the secrets. -.-

I never even told Q those stuffs I told her. Shrungs. I think something is changing between us. We're drifting, once again. I tried to pull us back together, but you're just doing nothing.

I hope our 10year friendship is strong enough to pull us back again.

Yup, we lunched at Kfc. I was sitting infront of her. God, I felt so sian because I have nothing to talk.


She was laughing at our (viv's and myself) convo about ____, lol.


Then Viv laughed too. Mei Ee was laughing at their laughter. I was laughing but I was taking pictures. And I was oblivious about S who doesn't find it funny at all.


All hyped up for the upcoming Chinese O's! I hope I can score well, I've been studying hard. (:

If I want something, nothing can stop me.

I do not want to be average anymore, average isn't an option. :P

HEY MR CHINESE, I'M GOING TO MARRY YOU ON MONDAY! LOVE YOU DARLING.

Dating Mr Chinese later.

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“ a scar on my heart. ”
Tuesday, May 13 |7:10 PM


& you think it's that easy to forget you.
Why is it I'm the only one who's hurt?
What's on the outside doesn't hurt as much as the heart, you'll never understand.

Labels:


“ i'm tired ”
Sunday, April 27 |7:08 PM


I'm tired.

The last week had been a whirlwind of activity and emotional ups and downs.

Few weeks ago, I finally felt how it was to be a bestfriend. I was there when qing was devasted. I accompanied, comforted, talked to her whenever I have the time. I never felt my importance to her before this because she'll obviously go to her boyfriend when she needed someone, not me. Now that the term "boyfriend" doesn't exist for her, all the more I should be there for her when she needs someone.

True enough, I was there when she needed me. Ironically, it seems like she's keeping things from me.

She only told me about this young man (i should stop using the word "guy, it's a slang.) called Yi Quan about 5 days of contacting him. I know she is not obliged to report to me every single detail of her life, but I am her bestfriend! (or is it just a status?) I wouldn't mind her not telling me once or twice, but it's been quite a number of times already. Plus, Yi Quan isn't some random man she knew. She doesn't reply my messages, but she replies Yi Quan's! (where's the logic?! Unless she likes him)

When asked "Why you reply his messages, never reply mine!" Quoted from qing "Cause, he's also someone who sort of help me ease my pain..." Okay, acceptable. But why did she only tell me about him about 5 days of continuous messaging?

Next, I only realized that she was contacting someone called Philbert (Joyce's friend) when I saw her talking on the phone via the webcam. I thought it was Yi Quan, but when I teased her "Yi Quan ah, Yi Quan~", she replied "No, it's Philbert" SNAPSZXZ, how am I supposed to know who on earth is this man called Philbert? And why is Philbert calling her? I don't even know Philbert existed, how did he appear out of nowhere? Why did he call qing and talk for about an hour? This shows that he could have known her for quite a while, that's why he called. G-R-E-A-T, I didn't even know who he is. I guess qing won't even bother explaining to me who this man was if I didn't see her talking via the webcam.

& she has been messaging in class. What's the big hooo-haa, you ask. She doesn't even message in class when she is with Jinghao! (3-4 messages during school time only) , but now she's messaging I-don't-know-who the whole day. Hey, she sacrifises her studies (in some way) and bothers to even reply these people.

Last tuesday, I thought I was messaging Bernice. Then came a text "Me and Brenda going to watch movie. You wanna come along? (:" I sillily thought was Bernice, I found it werid that she invited me along. I had plans that day, so I replied "Nah, I'm going to study with Vivien today. Enjoy your day!" After several messages, I realize that I've been messaging Qing instead of Bernice. I was furious. Why did Qing decided to go out with Brenda when we booked her to study first? She even agreed to study with us, but in the end, Brenda won. BRENDA WON. Brenda won vivien and me.

She said she wanted to tell me something the day before, but she didn't reply any of my messages. She said what she wanted to tell me was the movie thing that she and Brenda planned. Alright, she forgot to ask me too and forgot to tell me. Wow, she even forgot that we had plans to study. She totally decided to ignore us (vivien and me), decided to choose Brenda over us. Fine.

I told vivien :Qing not coming with us to study. She going out to watch movie with BRENDA
vivien: Orh kay.
shiqi: Go out with Brenda, then we're like shit. Sighs.
vivien: ya lor.

at this time, qing was somewhere near us.

vivien: heard what qiqi say anot, we're like shit.

I went back to my place, then qing came (we were in chemistry lab)

shiqi: you heard what I said
qing: ya.
shiqi: yeah.
qing was pissed already: no la. I go out with brenda still need to ask my mother, wait for her to agree... *starts blabbering all the nonsense*
shiqi: okay, just go and watch with her la.

What has your mother got to do with YOU choosing to go out with BRENDA even though you have agreed to study with us first? There is no link, I don't understand why you chose to pangseh us and go with Brenda. Logically, this wouldn't happen. You mean you study with us don't need to ask your mother? You mean watching movie is more constructive than studying? I don't get your point.

On thursday, vivien asked me "Aye, who is Nicholas" I was at that point, blur. "Nicholas? Nicholas? My mother's partner lor." then she said "no, nicholas... qing's friend" I was awestrucked. WHO THE HELL IS NICHOLAS. Why didn't she tell me about Nicholas then? I wouldn't even know he existed if vivien didn't ask me. Would she even tell me who Nicholas is, if I don't ask her? I doubt so.

That day, I called and confirmed with her if she wanted to study with me and vivien.

shiqi: qing, just asking if you wanna come with us to study tmr. With Mr Lim.
qing: eh... uh.... *change of tone and speaks faster* You wanna study at Arielle's house?
what the hell, why is Arielle in this whole picture?
shiqi: what?
qing: Arielle's house to study.
shiqi: NO.
qing: Why?
wlao, still dare to ask me why
shiqi: BECAUSE I'm going to study with vivien.
as if you don't know.
qing: oh, okay.
-silence for a pregnant half a minute-
shiqi: okay, bye.
qing: are you angry?
shiqi: ABIT
Duh!
 qing: don't be angry la.
Why should I? I'm asking you if you want to follow my plans and there you give me another plan.
shiqi: can you just tell me if you want to come OR not.
qing: i don't know la, i don't know. Tomorrow then decide la.
shiqi: okay, bye.

After that I received a text from her. "Sorry, don't be angry. I already agreed to study with Arielle. Smile okay."

Please la, you already agreed to study with Arielle, then why didn't you say earlier? Do you have to beat about the bush? You lied to me. This time, we also asked you before Arielle. I am very sure of that. Well, fine. You chose Arielle.

We asked if you wanted to study with us the week you ended your tournament. You agreed, but it never happened. When I said "I asked you earlier", then she'll give me replies such as "Aiyah! I already agreed to them le!" Hello, then what about the agreement with us? You agreed to us too! ):

There are so many things I don't know about you. There are so many things that you're keeping from me. I have to try to find those things out, you won't even care to share with me. I realize that if I don't start the conversation, we won't even talk. Why is this happening?

I find out that you've been going out with other classmates in the class. I'm fine with it, but I only know that you went out with other people from their conversations. Do you know how it feels when I get to know you from other people instead? It feels worst when I have to find things out from other people, really.

There are hundred and one things I wanna blog about you, but I have better things to do. I'm so pissed, I don't know how to get back the relationship. );

I tried so hard to get us back to normal, but you're putting yourself in a situation that will drift us further. Relationships won't work if I'm the only one working hard to mend it. It takes two hands to clap. I'm really tired of mending this broken relationship.

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“ Where's cupid? ”
Saturday, February 16 |6:33 PM

"How come your hamburger (the gummy) is sour de! Not fair." -Vivien
"Because I'm too sweet, neutralization is needed. " -Shiqi

lol!

When everyone else in the world is out dating their bfs, here I (or the PL lites) am studying and mugging my head off for cts. While I stay in my room and cry because I can't take it anymore, couples are out there having their candlelight dinner.

Cupid must be painted blind for not giving me a valentine. Yes, I know he/she is painted blind in Shakespherian's text. Stop reminding me about Literature. (:

I do actually wish that I have a Valentine, I wish I had someone to share everything I wanted to. Partly because my bestfriend has hers already, and I can't now call her up everyday to talk because she'll be talking to her bf. I go out less with her because she'll be out with him, argh. She makes me want to have a bf, sighs. Even Vivien has a crush, me? I don't even know if that's counted as a crush, lol? If it is, I had one last year. We used to msg each other everyday about everything, then suddenly everything faded day by day.

And by some chance, I dreamt of him yesterday. He was my boyfriend in my dream. (: Okay, it's not ever going to come true, so wake up shiqi. It's not even the time to get into a relationship.

My absence in the internet world is quite explainable isn't it? If you still don't get the hint - I AM HAVING MY CTS. Screwed up humanities, but I think I'm able to get full marks for Emaths paper, that is, if what Pearlyn said is false. I hope to aim for A1, haha.

I should go back to my chemistry. Mole concept!

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“ Ze day ”
Friday, January 4 |8:43 PM

*/edit

(i know I have been editing my posts, but I don't want just few short lines for a post, so yeah. I'll keep editing until I have a long post. Sorry! )

Hello. :D I went to shop for my cny attire/clothes. It's quite early, yes? But I'm gonna close myself in my room for the next few months (till the end of O's), so I think shop earlier better. Bought 1 dress, 1 jumper(again), two tops.

AH, there's house meeting tmr and tmr is monday which means I have two shows to watch, and then I'll be home late, I won't have time for revision. ARGHHH. Stupid house meeting, go also don't know want us do what. Haha. Anyway, I bought TYS today! Ohmg, it's the first time I wanted to buy an assessment book so badly. :D Good job to me. Gonna go do Amaths after typing this.





Today is ze day. :D Album got delayed.

But I've uploaded it in Imeem already. Enjoy! & Flh's album , Gary Cao Ge if anyone's interested.

Anyway, (don't kill me for saying this), I prefer BBT and FLH's album because it is (overall) nice even though their vocals kinda suck but the melody of the song and everything is appealing. I have to emphasize again that their vocals are just average. HOWEVER, the best songs & vocals came from 5566. I love Man You Zhong Guo, very nice melody and vocals, but then some tracks ain't that nice, so it seems like the whole album isn't nice. & the tracks I'm talking about is (for example) Bu La Bu La. I don't really like the melody because it's kind of irritating. (Maybe it's just isn't my taste.) And the Xin Ru Dao Ge is really slow? Haha, I don't know but it doesn't really appeal to me. Ohmg, kill me everyone. Oh yes, Gary's new album is like okay? Not as fantastic as the previous one, sighs.

*/edit
Okay, let me edit some stuff. After hearing 5566 album for the past 2 days, it's not so bad as it is, as in all the songs are generally nice except one that I really dislike is Bu La Bu La. Guess you'll have to take time listening or else you won't find the album nice, like BBT's. Haha, the more you listen the better it is some albums listen one time then very nice already, like for example: JJ? Haha, don't know.

Ah and yes, I don't know why but I feel damn fraeking happy when bbt topped the gmusic chart, winning F4. It's like the big woo haa news, I shall not say everywhere, but those places that bbt fans appear at, like forums. It is damn shocking because my mom thought that F4 would top the charts, and I trust her taste and therefore think the same way as she does, but no, F4 is somewhere else I don't know where. I wouldn't be that happy if F4 topped the charts (i guess), so I think my current obession for bbt is still much more higher than F4's. Haha.

& I listened to 933FM today to hear if bbt was in the charts, ah well, then I had to go for breakfast at 12noon. Decided not to listen the radio because I wanted to eat and watch Huan Huan Ai, but then when the DJ said "There's 3 new songs from the boybands in the charts this week." Ohmg, I was damn freaking nervous. (idk why) Still, I did not want to listen to the radio because I was damn hungry, so I walked down. But I just couldn't resist the temptation, so I ran up to look for my speakers for my Sony Ericsson phone, then watched Huan Huan Ai and listened to 933FM at the same time. I couldn't much be bothered when F4's song was played on the radio, maybe because it is common for them to be heard on the radio, haha. Then I heard BBT'S song few mins later, it's number 14 (i think), ohmg, I immediately off the television to listen to their song, even though it wasn't that nice. -.- haha. It's just shocking to hear their songs on the radio, especially local channel because I never thought they'll make it to Singapore, because I never heard their songs on radios even though they've released they're albums, unlike 5566. Haha, okay, so the whole point of this paragraph is that - I was high because bbt made it to the local charts! LOL. Damn happy. And I heard that 5566 was 10th? Wasn't sure, haha, didn't continue hearing the radio because my mom used my hp to listen to some other music. Heh heh. Go 5566 and bbt. :D Flh also lah, but they too famous liao, don't need me to jiayou.

*/end of edit

Today kinda screwed up because my leakage of the news that I quited tuition to Qing's mother. They got into cold war again, because of me. Sighs. I feel super bad because I've been causing problems for bestie, sighs. I didn't know that I caused so much trouble. *detailed entry soon*

I am going to blog this weekend, so till that very day, this post shall be at the top. Which means that I won't blog in the time being, because I've been busy with schoolwork.

I'm relaxing myself by watching Gossip Girl. Haha, finally a new episode. Btw, my form teacher is really inspiring and motivating. :D Very good. Everyone felt like studying after live lesson (If you don't know, it's something like contact time with teachers) because of what he said. Nothing special, but it's just motivating. Very good teacher so far. But the worst part is that we had Literature after Live lesson, sighs. All the motivating went to the drain because KEL isn't motivating, super shit sarcastic.

---------------
*/edit

Let me update on 01012008. :D

Met up with Qing at AMK Hub to eat waffles. Haha, we acted like are like retards in NeBo. We were soo stupid, we didn't know what's the game package, and there were no waffles so we ordered ice cream and a drink. The man at the cashier kept laughing at us pleasee. Ah, then we realised that we only ordered one drink so we went back to the cashier and ordered another drink, gave him Jinghao's NeBo card again, this time he realised that the picture wasn't Qing and then kept giggling again, lol. Then we were damn retarded because we didn't know how ask them for the games to play, lol. The same guy at the cashier laughed at us again, tsk! How can he laugh at his customers! haha. So we chilled there with the ice creams, drinks and games all the way till 6PM. :D Quite a nice place to hang out.


My ice cream.

She was praying. She didn't want to land on my territory, cause it will cost a bomb.

But in the end, I lost because she ate up all my money with one damn house! Hahaha.

Oooh, and the monopoly is spongebob one leh!

So we walked around, chatted in the baby room beside the toilet. Shopped and slacked around, then we went to the arcade. Haha, pushed her into the neoprint machine to camwhore. :D lol, she bluff me lah, she said she didn't like to camwhore because she's not photogenic, then after that I told her "eh, don't need camwhore liao la, you don't like." then she replied.. "No! I like to camwhore." Huh, like since when? haha. But I know that she like to camwhore alone at home, like me lah. (but that's because I have no one to camwhore with me.)

We got kicked out because we were kept hogging at the machine, so we played basketball, ate sushi, walked around then she kept sneezing and tearing. Tsktsk, sick liao. Her makeup smudged and then we were like losers, we went to shops so she can draw her eyeliner back. lol! The first shop we went to was okay, as in they didn't see it cause I was blocking, then after that the woman kept staring at us. -.- The second shop we went was damn strict can! They kept staring since we walk in. Haha, in the end eyeliner also never draw properly.


My pants look so bubbly, it's not okay! haha.

Haha, so cute ah bestie.

*tongues out* fats out.

Hug you "my fair lady" *inside joke*

candid

PS: The ones at the bottom were taken by bestie's phone, so the colour looks different.

Unglam.

Why do I look so photoshopped? haha.

Candid.

Me candid.

CHUUU~

Hugs you wifey. *repeated shot*

0_0

Haha?

Candid.

Stare what stare.

Byebye.

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“ edited a million ”
Wednesday, January 2 |7:54 PM

Hello, I feel like crying now.

Somehow I feel that 2008 isn't a very good year. Sighs, Sherminh's my everyday partner now. I don't know why but I feel a sense of disappointment. We chose our partners anyway, I didn't choose her, she came to be and bestie was somewhere else. ): Nah, not I don't want to sit with her or what, but since the start of school, I've been neglecting bestie just to talk to Sherminh because I didn't want her to feel extra, but now I feel damn bad to bestie. I don't know, I can't seem to control my emotions now.

& I just received a call from bestie's mother, asking me when's tuition starting. I hate this. Ohmg, once again I have to deal with this problem, I hate it. I know her mother hates me. GAH. I hate dealing with this.

  • This damn tuition is not working for me.
  • In the first place I didn't even want to change tuition not because of bestie's MOM.
  • We quited the previous tutor and came to this. But I am not doing well here, I want to quit but I feel bad because it's bestie's boyfriend's brother.
  • If I quit I will affect the others because they have to pay more money.
  • Me and bestie thinks that the previous tutor is better but her damn mother doesn't get the point.
  • I prefer the previous tutor. Her mom knows that and asked me to go back, but hello! The problem is that I WILL AFFECT THE OTHERS & I KNOW THAT HER MOM WILL HATE ME MORE, AND HER MOTHER DOESN'T WANT ME TO QUIT.
  • I am the EXTRA person because Vivien prefers this tutor and bestie don't dare to tell her mom that she doesn't like this tuition BECAUSE her damn mother is biased and likes her bf and therefore likes her bf brother MORE than her own daughter. But hey, she knows that she isn't happy with her daughters results and yet she doesn't want to change the damn tutor and asked bestie to ask the tutor to give more work. We did ask him to give more work but he only gave Raffles paper. Wth? We are not geniuses like you. She knows her daughter dropped from an A to C, but she insist not changing the tutor. Why am I even in this situation. I dropped from A too! Ohmg. I hate this.

    Urgh, I am damn unhappy now. I cried. I've been harping on this issue since last year okay! Ohmg, I just broke down and cried when my mom called me.



    QUITING TUITION.

    • I was damn sad just now, even my current obsession (wangzi) can't cure me. Still stressed now (over the O levels) and everything.

    Bestie, Vivien and me cried just now. Even though I'm not that close to Vivien now, I still feel the attachment with her. ): No more tuition means not so much contact with vivien and the time we bond together. Quite sad for that though. I thought I was the only one wanting to quit tuition, but in the end I wasn't.

    I WILL POST PICTURES WHEN I'M FREE. Which is apparently, not so soon.

    */edit

    I AM SO DEAD.

    I haven't handed up my Chinese Close passage book because I left 5 close passages & I only circled them and didn't write the words out. Mdm/Mrs Tan said that if we didn't hand up on the DEADline, she won't scold nor give you zero, she'll just ask you to quit Chinese O Levels. Yes, I haven't handed up, I am so dead.

    Ah, I can't really stand my partner anymore. ): I know I should try, but I tried for past few years already, geeesh. Oh yes, we don't have to act american kids and walk around of the whole school already.

    HOMEROOM SYSTEM DEMOLISHED.

    This homeroom system sucks, school's always try it for a year and then it'll be demolished. My form teacher looks like Judy Zhou Ding Wei. Ohmg, and he tries to act cool. He's from RI and he gives us his handphone number plus email (for facebook, msn and such) wth? I think he's trying to tell us to add him in facebook and msn, stupid.

  • Chinese teacher is really stressing us even though she tried to put it in a nice way.
  • Literature teacher is old and tries to act cute with her dramama actions, super shit sarcastic.
  • Add Maths teacher is superbly tall and he has eyes that really pop out, he pronounces "all" and "rall".
  • Form teacher looks like Zhou Ding Wei who tries to act cool, but isn't that cool but actually funny.
  • Social Studies teacher is damn cute with her bangs and we kept teasing her because she's out ex form teacher. Superbly super pleaseee.
  • Chemistry teacher is doesn't laugh at her own lame jokes but we do.
  • Maths teacher may be discipline mistress.
  • English teacher has the same name as someone from S.H.E, different spelling though. Strict.
  • Physics teacher will get the hell out of his class.
  • Elective geog teacher is still anonymous as yet.

    I am not quite happy with my english banding because I am friendless there except for Bernice. But I wonder if she remembers what I said to her. Haha, stupif blur pok like me. Add maths banding class is damn freaking stressful, I'm in Band 1 and the people look like nerds, haha, nevermind can motivate me.

    Oh, I broke the school rule by typing that chunk out, I own demerit points. Haha, no they haven't caught me yet, lol.

    Labels:


    • “ last post peeps. ”
    Monday, December 31 |10:29 PM

    It's the last day of 2007. Last post for 2007! :] It's about dramas and some emoistic stuff, don't bother reading, hahaha. I'll dig out my older pictures and post later in my 2008 post, tata~

    Meh. I've got tons of work not done yet. Geography of food, literature, newspaper article for chem. Tsktsk, this is the first time I ever have undone homework. That's a bad sign.

    lol. Watching They Kiss Again now, :]
    Zhishu and Xiangqin still doesn't look like a couple, they don't hold hands and they talk like normal friends, haha. Xiangqin became a teacher, okay, she wants to be a teacher. Ohmg, the girl that likes Yushu appeared, lol, she's called Hao Mei and Xiangqin damn nice, she told haomei her story. Where got teacher like that! lol.

    Awww, Hebe and Mike looks quite together. :] Heh heh, but why did Hebe say that Leewei's the most important guy in her life? Ohmg. Leewei damn nice in this show la, he asked Mike to take care of Hebe. Urgh, then Mike agreed to marry someone else because of his dad's company. Hahaha, damn funnny, the guys helped Hebe to purchase clothes for her first date, lol!

    Anyway, went to town to shop and eat just now. While shopping and eating I kept thinking of bestie and the acs badminton team, cause they're going to Cineleisure to watch movie or something. I was thinking if I could bump into them, hahaha. But maybe they're going there at night. :/ Not sure, bestie stopped messaging me already, sighs. I kept thinking of Masa, cause we went taka the other time. (memories) Ohmg, what's wrong with me. I kept thinking that I'll bump into him (and the badminton team) and bestie! Gah, I think he has a bad impression of me because I didn't really help him the other time when he injured his leg. (opps) Haiyah, really missed him... God. STOP THINKING!

    Gah, I have no programmes tonight. No countdown or anything, no friends, sobs. Sherminh's going out with her bandfriends, Bestie with badminton people of acs and her bf, lost contact with esther, vivien's not allowed to be out at night, other friends not very close. My life damn not chiong leh, I need some chiongster friends, like those who goes to countdown parties, sighs. I kinda regret rejecting bestie to go out with the badminton people. But on the other hand, I don't think I'll ennjoy myself there, like all the badminton people and I have one to talk to because bestie will be with her bf. -.- Okay, I am very confused too. I need to make more friends whom are willing to go out with me~ sheeesh, sherminh's very distant now cause she made alot of new (band) friends. People of my age are out at orchard preparing for countdown yet I'm here. Wah, my life damn mundane la. Shouldn't be so emoo, later I cry on last day AGAN. It's always the case.

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    “ *pissed* ”
    Monday, October 1 |11:03 PM

    I am effing pissed off now. Because my damn door refuses to close & I am super hot, I need to on the air conditioner.

    YADAYADA.

    You may want to say:"HAHA! Your door is against you! Complain what shit, our fault is it?"

    No, of course not. My maid's! Yes, her fault again. I have no idea what's wrong with all the maids. They think it's cool to open the door 90 degrees. They think their madams will praise them because they did their work by opening the door for 90 degrees.

    Mind you, the door isn't made to be opened 90 degrees. And great job, the door is stuck now, I can't switch on the air conditioner.

    *GROWLS*

    I am damn pissed off. When I peacefully inform my mom about the situation, she said she was on her way to Mustafa. She asked me to use the chair to keep the door in position first. When I told her IT CAN'T. She claims she's meeting a client and therefore hanged the phone.

    So... which is the truth? Going to Mustafa or meeting a client?

    I HATE YOU (at times).

    I hate it when you take your time talking to some useless shit but refuses to spend time with me. I hate it when you claim that you hate a person but you actually spend hours with him. I hate it when you try to make use of people. I hate it when you lie. I hate it when you treat your partner more importantly than HIM. I hate it when you actually laugh at the messages your partner sent to you. I hate it when you need to talk privately. I hate it when you stop talking whenever he's back. I hate it when you talk to him nicely when he talks loudly but refuses to talk to me even when I'm talking nicely. I hate every single action you do now. You seem so superficial. You aren't the same person I know.

    So what if it's for my bed room set? So what if it's for me? I don't care. I rather remain in this room then to see you in this state.

    I don't know what's happening to you. You're spending more time with HIM than HIM. I had enough when you and dad divorce. I had enough! I hate it when history repeats itself.

    I may be young, but I am not a fool. I can see that something went wrong with the relationship. The problem didn't exist before HE appeared.

    Labels: